Dealing with Difficult People and How to Listen with Your Ears and Eyes

Author : Judy Esmond

Dealing with difficult people is tough work Whether these people are in your working or personal life You do have to try communicating with them

COPING WITH DIFFICULT PEOPLE BEYOND THE WORDS

When working with difficult people you must make sure to concentrate on effective communication strategies Many people respond just to the words that are spoken Such words are very emotional and distressing and when you only notice the words being said, you become mixed up in a pile of emotions such as fear, anger, stress and more You have to become more aware of both the nonverbal and verbal communication patterns in dealing with people

THE MOST POWERFUL ADVICE FOR YOU

The most powerful piece of advice for you in communicating is to listen both with your ears and with your eyes How do you do this? Here are two communication strategies for you to use

GO FURTHER THAN WORDS AND LISTEN TO TONE OF VOICE

Strategy 1 You have to listen beyond the words that a person is using and hear the tone of their voice Ever have someone say they are not upset by what you did, but the tone of their voice told you the opposite? They sounded frustrated and angry In reality, they were very upset Their words said one thing but the tone of their voice said the opposite Listen carefully then to their tone of voice

LISTENING WITH YOUR EYES AND NOT YOUR EARS

Strategy 2 What is actually listening with your eyes? This is about concentrating on their body language in dealing with difficult people You have to watch with your eyes the type of body language of this other person Such body language forms over 80 percent of all our communication patterns Have you realized that words and the body language a person demonstrates can be very different? For example, when someone says they are not upset by your behavior, however, their body language shows clenched teeth and clenched fists If you listen with your eyes and watch the body language you will find out so very much more You will understand what that person is really communicating to you They are upset

THE FULL PICTURE AND BRINGING IT TOGETHER

When you pay attention to both the verbal and non-verbal communication you will be way ahead of everyone else who barely takes notice of what is being said Few people put it together to get the whole picture in communicating with another person Having the ability to do this is even more important in coping with difficult people Why?

TESTING YOUR SKILLS IN COMMUNICATING

As dealing with difficult people at work or in your personal life they genuinely do disturb you They really put your emotions into overdrive The more worked up you are the more ineffectual you are in being able to pay attention, especially to the non-verbal communication of this other person With such really difficult people, if you’re able to concentrate on reading their non-verbals and hearing their tone of voice not only their words, then you’re in much greater control

DETACHED FROM IT ALL AND UNEMOTIONAL

But you do need to remain as calm and as emotionally detached as you can The more emotional you become the less able you are to pick up real communication that is happening beyond just the words So strive to remain calm and focus on the communication process

DEALING WITH DIFFICULT PEOPLE WITH CONTROL

You certainly have greater emotional control As you concentrate beyond just the upsetting and angry words that this person is using, to seeing other parts of their communication patterns

DEVELOPING YOUR COMMUNICATION SKILLS

At every opportunity in dealing with people, but particularly with a difficult person aim to sharpen your communication skills Go beyond the words to listen to their tone of voice and watch the body language they are displaying Your focus is on the communication not just the person You will gain insights into what they really mean You will gain greater power over your own emotions and all communication in dealing with difficult people

Are you dealing with a difficult person or people in your life? Could you use some great ideas on what to do? You are most welcome to grab a free copy of my book on Dealing with Difficult People: 17 Ideas on How to Deal with Difficult People by clicking on this link to the website now http://www.nodifficultpeople.com Dr Judy is an international expert on dealing with people and stress.

Syndication Source: Article Mind